The Golden Medallion, Translated by Runamuck

Narrator: The sharp Lt. De Martinet had orders to bring the cargo ship the Golden Lute to the island La Sabatina. He has been trusted to keep an eye on Aunt Prudence, the governor’s sister, and the pretty Camilla, the niece of the governor. But he is having bad luck, just short of the destination captain Rogers ship the Dark Shark gets in his way. Shortly thereafter a wild battle starts.
Roger: Board the Golden Lute! Board her!
(In the background you can hear yells and sabre-rattling from the battle.) 
Prudence: Outrageous! How do the pirates dare to attack my brother’s ship?
De Martinet: Fight you cowards! Governor Broadside will not show any mercy if pirates get their hands on the cargo! Fight!
Camilla: Poor Spinoza. Look, he is terrified.
Prudence: What are you talking about Camilla? Who is Spinoza? Hopefully not one of those rude sailors?
Camilla: No aunt Prudence, Spinoza is the monkey in the cage over there. The poor guy is scared to death.
Prudence: How do you think I feel? Do you think I’m not scared?
Camilla: I’ll be right back. Wait for me here.
Prudence: But Camilla! You can’t!
Narrator: Camilla is not impressed by the fighting soldiers and pirates. She walks right across the ship over to the scared monkey.
Pirate: Damn it!
Soldier: What?
Camilla: Would you please let me through, you can resume fighting in a moment if you absolutely have to.
Pirate: Make room for the lady, you stupid soldier. Please lady, move right away.
Camilla: Thanks a lot. Continue!
Soldier: I’ll have your head! Ha jay!
Camilla: Poor Spinoza, you’re afraid, aren’t you? You don’t have to be afraid anymore, I’m always with you. Come to me, hmm?
Jonathan: One moment sweetie, I’ll take the pearls around your neck into safekeeping. Ha ha ha ha ha, so the pirates won’t seal them.
Camilla: You! Let me go! Soldiers, help me!
Jonathan: Ha ha ha ha, they have run away. Now give me the pearls!
Camilla: No!
Will: Stop! Pirates do not fight with women and children, not even you Jonathan! (Will punches Jonathan.)
Narrator: In front of Camilla stands a young man with bright happy eyes. He’ll make sure that no harm comes to her and that no one will seal anything from her.
Jonathan: What are you Will?
Roger: Bosun Will! You are supposed to fight the governor’s soldiers, not our own men!
Will: Ay Ay, captain, but we don’t fight young ladies. Watch out! Behind you!
Roger: Bloody amateur! Shall I show you how to fight with a sabre?
Camilla: Thank you, that was very nice of you.
Will: Ehr, thanks. I…
Camilla: Oh, it was very dashing, the rude man wanted to take my pearls. He wanted to rip them right from my neck.
Will: I hope that he didn’t hurt you. I would never forgive myself if….
Roger: Enough with the love talk get back to work Will!
Will: Ay Ay, captain, I’ll be right there! (Whispering to Camilla) No fear pretty lady, no harm will come to you.
Roger: Take those 3 soldiers; I have to talk to Lt. De Martinet.
Will: Ay Ay, captain! I love fighting with 3 guys at once.
Narrator: Camilla is awestruck. That’s the feared captain Roger? She has heard a lot about him, but she imagined him differently. He is wearing an eye patch over his left eye, his left arm does not end in a hand, but in an iron hook, and he also has a peg leg. But he does not look like a villain; he looks more like an adventurous daredevil.
Roger: Hey De Martinet, where are you, you old fiend? There you are! Tell your men that they should put down their arms and surrender.
De Martinet: Ha ha ha, never captain Roger, we won’t surrender. Governor Broadside’s soldiers would rather die than put down their arms, right men?
(The soldiers do not sound enthusiastic.) 
De Martinet: Uh? You are putting down you sabres?
Roger: Right people, drop your weapons.
De Martinet: Oh well, Captain Roger, on the other hand we are of course not fanatics either.
(The pirates are cheering in the background.) 
Narrator: The pirates plunder the governor’s ship. They take everything that seems to be of value to them. Afterwards they retreat to the Dark Shark.
Roger: Good loot, helmsman Rummy, we can be satisfied.
Rummy: I found this little chest in De Martinet’s cabin, but I can’t get it open.
Roger: Looks interesting let me have a look. Will, open it!
Will: No problem captain, give it to me Rummy.
Rummy: Here, I bet you can’t open it, the lock is too complicated.
Will: Already open.
Rummy: What’s inside it?
Will: Just papers, a map and a letter for governor Broadside.
Roger: Nothing valuable? Throw the junk overboard. Away with it. Let the sharks break their teeth on it.
Will: Ay Ay, captain.
Roger: And now hoist the sails, we’re leaving, let’s go! All men to the rigging!
Rummy: Hoist the sails people!
Pirate: Yes sir!
Roger: Cut the ropes to the Golden Lute!
Rummy: Cut the ropes!
Pirate: Ay Ay, sir!
Roger: Hey Will? You look like a love struck cockatoo. The girl has done this to you, eh? Do you even know who that is?
Will: No, unfortunately not captain.
Roger: The niece of the governor.
Will: Broadside’s niece? That can’t be true?
Roger: That was Camilla. Forget that you met her. Enjoy the life at sea. Ouch! What was that?
Will: A coconut captain. It fell on your head; the monkey up there threw it.
Roger: A monkey that is throwing coconuts? Where did that come from?
Will: From the governor’s galleon. It climbed over during the battle.
Roger: I don’t want any monkeys on my ship. I’ll show it, it’ll get shot!
Will: But Roger! It’s just an innocent monkey.
Roger: I don’t want it!
Will: Captain! Don’t you know the secret of all successful pirates?
Roger: What secret?
Will: Eh, a pirate captain who wants to get a lot of loot must have a monkey on his ship. The monkey is a good luck charm. The great… the great Pierre Lafitte, the most successful of all pirates…
Roger: W-w-w-what’s shining up there? What is that think around the monkey’s neck? That isn’t…
Will: Gold! It’s gold, captain!
Roger: I’ll shoot that monkey. I want the gold!
Will: No! The monkey could fall into the water! The gold would be lost. Would you risk that, captain?
Roger: You’re right, I won’t shoot. But I want that gold, and you’ll make sure I get it. So, lure the monkey down, even if it takes all night, I want that gold!
Will: You can trust me; I’ll get it for you, even if it takes until dawn.
Narrator: The next morning the Dark Shark reaches an island, it’s the mysterious pirate island. The ship anchors in the harbour of the pirate village, and captain Roger and his men leave the ship. Their first way leads them to their favourite tavern which is called The Bottomless Barrel.
Roger: Ha ha, now we’ll get something to eat, for me it must be no less than a leg of lamb.
Will: We have a reason to celebrate; we have enough money to stay a whole month.
Bessie: Welcome home captain. Got some good loot?
Roger: Oh, not exactly overwhelming, Bessie. We only caught two cargo ships and the Golden Lute.
Bessie: Oh well, times change. When my good husband, god bless his soul, still went to sea he had the habit of plundering at least one village before lunch.
Roger: Sad though that he found such a sudden end, that was probably after lunch.
Bessie: Oh yes, I warned him that he shouldn’t attack the governor’s ship with a rowboat, but he wouldn’t listen.
Roger: Brave man, those were times. These days the young boys can’t even catch a monkey. Ha ha ha, but let’s go inside, we can pay.
Bessie: Guests like that are always welcome, get in.
Popsy: And now a bottle of rum.
Jimbo: Captain Roger?
Roger: What’s up Jimbo. Cabin boys have no business at the tavern, get out!
Bessie: Take it easy, captain. The Bottomless barrel is my tavern, and I throw out people who have no business here, understood?
Roger: Understood Bessie. When you start yelling we tuck in our tails.
Bessie: So, cabin boy, get out! Hurry!
Jimbo: But I have a question for the captain, it’s really important, Flashfork, the cook, wants to know something.
Bessie: The cook?
Roger: The cook? Well, if it’s about the kitchen it could be important. Talk already Jimbo, what is it about?
Jimbo: The cook wants to know if we should load 20 barrels of rum and 2 barrels of water, or the other way around.
Roger: 2 barrels of water? What are we supposed to do with all that water, we’ll just get stomach lice from it. Tell the cook that one barrel is plenty.
Jimbo: Ay Ay, captain.
Roger: Hey, how did the monkey get here?
Jimbo: He followed me, captain. I’ll take him with me.
Roger: No way, the monkey stays here. You go back on board alone, understood?
Jimbo: Ay Ay, captain.
Bessie: Here are the drinks. Dive in.
Roger: Sure we will. Oh, Will, great monkey tamer, let’s take a look on the collar. I’m curious what the monkey has.
Will: looks like a gold coin.
Roger: Yes, half of a coin.
Will: Captain, what is that supposed to mean?
Roger: Hmm, something has been scratched into the coin; it looks like a treasure map.
Narrator: Captain Roger’s eye suddenly becomes big and round. He smells gold, and gold always lets his heart beat faster.
Will: Yes, you’re right, a path was scratched into it. A cross, a circle, a bush, what is that for an island?
Roger: The drawing on the coin is supposed to lead us to the treasure, hmm, that’s clear. But this is only one half of the map; we need the other half of the coin.
Will: Huh, the monkey was on the governor’s ship, maybe there was something about this in the letters we threw away.
Roger: What? You threw away the documents? How can you be that dumb?
Will: It was your orders, captain.
Roger: What? Me! So, hmm, then I guess it was a good decision.
Will: What is written on the backside of the coin?
Roger: On the backside, hmm, well, a skull with two crossed pistols. That reminds me of something, but what?
Peter: Ha ha ha ha, that is the insignia of the Blackheart cousins.
Narrator: An old, white haired man walks over to the table. He is using two crutches because he has only one leg. He looks at captain roger with a sly look in his eyes.
Roger: Peter? What do you know about this? Talk man! Get over here, sit down, and drink as much as you want.
Peter: Ho ho, just the way I like it, Bessie.
Bessie: What shall I serve you, you old bum?
Peter: Give me rum, but a big mug.
Bessie: Will do, Peter, right away.
Roger: Well, talk old man.
Peter: About 50 years ago the Blackheart cousins captured a ship with a huge treasure, a chest full of gold. They buried the treasure on an island, scratched the location into a coin, and broke the coin in half.
Roger: Why that?
Peter: Ha, there is a simple reason for that, Roger; you can only find the island and the treasure if you have both halves. They thought that was the safe way to keep the treasure.
Will: Why did they hide the treasure?
Peter: Because the governor’s ship was after them.
Bessie: Drink!
Peter: That’s about time, Bessie.
Roger: Go on, what happened next?
Peter: They had to split up. John Blackheart disappeared somewhere in the jungle, and Brian had the great idea to plunder Port Royal.
Will: That’s insane; the governor’s town is guarded by Fort Rasselsword. What happened to him?
Peter: No idea. Nobody ever heard from him again. I believe his old bosun still lives in Port Royal.
Roger: Ahaha, make the Dark Shark ready, we’re leaving port.
Will: What? Where do you want to go captain?
Roger: Only you could ask something that dumb, Will, we’re going to Port Royal of cause. Old-timer, where do we find Blackheart’s bosun?
Peter: Well, it is said that he is selling fruit in Port Royal, ha ha ha.
Roger: Alright, let’s go!
Will: Captain, do you really want to go to Port Royal?
Roger: You bet it want to go there.
Will: But that is the town is ruled by governor Broadside, and we have just plundered one of his ships.
Rummy: Exactly, Broadside is probably furious.
Will: That can’t go well.
Rummy: If he catches us we’re done for.
Roger: Will, stop whining! You too Rummy.
Will: But Port Royal is filled to the brim with soldiers. It won’t take 5 minutes before they have caught us.
Roger: Stop that nonsense or I’ll convince you with this!
Will: With the revolver?
Roger: Exactly. I do not fear Broadside’s soldiers. I smell gold; do you know what that means? Gold! Gold!….
Foul: Did you hear that, Culverin?
Culverin: Clearly, captain Foul, I’m not deaf. He said that the governor is curious.
Foul: Furious! He is furious, Culverin. But if even the cowardly pirate captain Roger is willing to enter the den of the lion there must be a lot of gold at stake. Culverin, a whole lot of gold.
Culverin: And you will let captain Roger get it?
Foul: No! No way! From now on we won’t let captain Roger out of our sight, and when he has found the gold we’ll take it. Ha ha ha ha….
Narrator: Two days late are captain Roger and a few of his pirates actually in Port Royal. Through secret paths they have been able to sneak into the town which is guarded by the governor’s soldiers. Captain Roger is strutting around in the streets, completely relaxed, as if nothing could happen to them. As on most of their trips, Popsy the parrot is sitting on his shoulder.
Roger: Didn’t I tell you Will, no soldiers in sight.
Will: No, but you can hear them. A group just marched past us on the other side of the wall. I don’t want to ruin your mood, but it’s making me nervous.
Roger: Nonsense, take a look over there, that’s our fruit pirate. He is selling bananas. When I grow old I definitely won’t be doing that, I only trade in gold.
Will: In fool’s gold, yes. But no reason to worry captain, we won’t grow old in this town; the governor’s soldiers will make sure of that.
Roger: Hello, old friend! Do you only sell fruit or do you also sell other nice things? Maybe some information?
Skip: Ha ha ha ha, but isn’t that captain Roger, the greatest pirate since Pierre Lafitte, the lord of the Dark Shark?
Roger: Well, what do you know! The old guy knows me.
Will: Keep it on captain, and then you’ll soon be able to ask governor Broadside and Lt. De Martinet if they know you.
Skip: The boy’s right, come in before someone sees you. Here, behind the curtain, it’s safer.
Roger: You’re Brian Blackheart, aren’t you?
Skip: Nonsense, I’m Skip, I was Brian Blackheart’s bosun. Oh boy, those were times. I dream of it every day. If we just hadn’t attacked Port Royal.
Roger: That’s the thing, how did the battle for Port Royal turn out?
Skip: Bad for us. Blackheart’s plan didn’t work. The soldiers of the former governor drove us back.
Will: And Brian Blackheart?
Skip: We were both imprisoned. I spent 20 years on the prison island, after that I started selling fruit.
Will: And Blackheart?
Skip: Well, kid, he was thrown into the deepest dungeon of Fort Rasselsword and was later sent to Europe.
Roger: Europe?
Skip: And he was sentenced there. I have no idea if he is still alive.
Roger: Oh, we can forget everything then. His half of the golden coin is lost to us.
Skip: You know of the coin? And now you’re hungering for the other half? You are on the hunt for the treasure?
Will: Now we can admit it, the search is over.
Skip: Why that? Blackheart let me know that he hid something in the dungeon. Maybe he meant the other half of the coin? Could be?
Will: In the prison of Port Royal? And you haven’t tried to get it out? Why not?
Skip: Because only prisoners who have been sentenced to death end in the dungeon. That dubious honour has not been given to me.
Roger: I understand, well, it was nice to have hope. Let’s go Will. Thanks a lot, Skip.
Skip: No thanks necessary, captain, always at your service. Maybe you would like to buy some bananas? Grade A.
Narrator: Depressed captain Roger leaves the fruit seller. Will on the other hand doesn’t think it’s all that bad; he is not as obsessed with the gold as the pirate captain is. On their way through the town he tries to cheer Roger up, and misses that they are walking straight towards some soldiers. The uniformed men march down the street.
Roger: So close to the goal, and then it fails. There must be a way to get into the dungeon without a death sentence. Do you want a banana?
Will: No thanks. Getting into the dungeon can happen quickly, but getting out again alive, that’s the problem. My father didn’t succeed at that. Hey, you can’t throw the banana peel away like that.
Roger: You mean that someone could slip on it? Ha ha ha ha, what do I care?
Narrator: Completely relaxed Roger throws the banana peel away; he doesn’t notice that it lands right beneath the soldiers’ feet. The consequences are fatal. The soldiers slip and fall to the ground.
Soldier: Grab them! They are pirates!
Will: Damn it!
Soldier: Treason! Grab them! Arrest them!
Roger: Run Will, run as fast as you can! I’ll run this way, you’ll run the other. Go!
Will: Ay ay, captain!
Soldier: Stop them!
Roger: Good luck Will. They’ll never get me.
Will: Me neither, someone else would be needed for that.
Soldier: Don’t let them get away, come on guys, let’s show them!
Soldier: We have got one of them! Where is the other guy? The fat one with the peg leg?
Soldier: He got away.
Roger: Shiver my timbers, they got Will. He fell and hit his head on a barrel. He is unconscious. I have to free him, but maybe I shouldn’t hurry, when I think of the dungeon, hmmhmm….
Narrator: Captain Roger has an idea, because he can’t get the gold off his mind. Didn’t Blackheart hide something in the dungeon? What if Will ended there and found what they were searching for? No, it was probably better to wait a little.
Governor Broadside is the lord of Fort Rasselsword. While Will is thrown into the dungeon, Broadside is sitting in his palace and attending his favourite pastime, he eats. He has already eaten a whole chicken as Lt. De Martinet appears. He is making a rather submissive impression.
De Martinet: Governor, may I enter?
Broadside: If you have to, what is going on?
De Martinet: Excuse me Sir, but we have captured one of the pirates who attacked and plundered our cargo ship the Golden Lute. My men will bring him here in a moment.
Broadside: Well well.
De Martinet: Yes, this man actually dared to come to Port Royal. My brave men overpowered him and fought off 12 others.
Broadside: I understand, that must have been a tough battle. Well, come; let’s go into the next room.
De Martinet: Yes sir.
Broadside: There we are, as I can see my beloved sister Prudence and niece are already here. They do not want to miss the show. Bring the pirate in.
De Martinet: Very well, bring Bosun Will in here!
Soldat: Yes sir, bring him in here!
Broadside: So you belong to the pirates? What do you have to say in your defence? I want to know it before we show you what we do to pirates.
Will: Pirate? But noble lord, I’m just an orphaned fisher boy who has to provide for an old mother and 3 aunts.
Broadside: Enough, enough, that’s more than enough. Whip him and hang him.
De Martinet: Oh yes!
Camilla: No!
Broadside: What?
Camilla: Uncle, you can’t do that. He came to my rescue when a pirate wanted to seal my pearls.
Prudence: Camilla! You haven’t talked to this subject, have you? Pirates!
Camilla: I have aunt Prudence. Please, dear uncle, have mercy on him.
Broadside: Well, if it means that much to you.
Camilla: Yes uncle, yes.
Broadside: Well then, I will have mercy on him. Lieutenant! We will leave out the whipping, and hang him right away, tomorrow morning.
De Martinet: Oh well.
Broadside: Do you have anything to say, pirate?
Will: Yes sir. Does it have to be tomorrow? Tomorrow I wanted to sleep in for once.
Broadside: How rude! Take him away!
Camilla: Oh no!
De Martinet: As you command, sir. Throw the man in the dungeon; he will be hanged tomorrow morning!
Broadside: Well, that was it, now to eat in peace.
Camilla: But uncle!
Broadside: Bring me another chicken.
Narrator: The soldiers take Will away and throw him into the dungeon. His situation seems hopeless, but he is not worried, he has plenty of time until next morning, and until then a lot can happen. He knows captain Roger won’t let him down. Hours pass and night falls.
Will: What’s that? Someone has scratched something into the stone. Yes, an insignia, Blackhearts’ insignia, the crossed pistols, underneath that 3 circles and a cross in the east. What could that mean? Hmm, of course 3 steps east, 3 stones to the east! Aha, this is the 3rd stone; let’s see, oh, it’s loose. Come on, that’s the way, oh. The other coin, now we have both halves. But what good is that?
Soldier: He is in there, but only for a minute miss Camilla. Your uncle will kill me if he ever hears of this.
Camilla: I have paid you well soldier, also watch out that no one will interfere. Close the door.
Soldier: Yes miss Camilla, as you command.
Will: Camilla?
Narrator: Will can’t believe his own eyes. Is the beautiful niece of the governor really coming down to him in the dungeon? Yes it’s really her, and she has even brought something to eat and drink.
Camilla: Unfortunately I wasn’t able to convince my uncle to set you free, but at least you don’t have to starve. Here!
Will: That’s nice of you, now I at least don’t have to hang on an empty stomach.
Camilla: Please don’t talk about it. I…
Narrator: Suddenly a loud bang is heard. Half the wall of the dungeon is missing, and then….
Will: Captain Roger?
Roger: Hello there.
Popsy: Big boom, wall fall.
Camilla: What happened? Half the wall is gone!
Will: Are you hurt?
Camilla: No, just a little scared.
Roger: Don’t talk, hurry. Get out, hurry, get out now!
Popsy: Devil and gun barrel.
Will: Couldn’t you have come two minutes later? We just wanted to…
Camilla: But Will!
Roger: That’s the thanks for saving your life? Go, faster, that way. The guards are coming, hurry!
(Lots of shooting can be heard in the background.) 
Camilla: They are shooting at me
Will: They are shooting at anything that moves. It’s too dark and they don’t know that you are with us.
Roger: There on the beach is my boat.
Will: We should probably split up here Camilla. We can’t take you with us.
Camilla: But I have to come with you, my uncle is going to blow up if he hears that I was in the dungeon with you.
Will: Camilla I…
Roger: Run to the boat.
Camilla: I have to disappear for some time until he has calmed down. Please take me with you: you can set me off at a village on the east coast of the island.
Roger: Ay Ay, my lady, but if you don’t get into the boat soon, it’ll be too late. The soldiers are coming over there, do you see? They are over there under the palm trees.
Camilla: All right, I’m in. Oh, we can go.
Roger: And away we go. Grab the oars Will.
Will: Yes, one moment captain, look what I found.
Roger: What’s that?
Will: Half of a coin, the other half.
Narrator: Wumm! It’s like a pound on a drum. Captain Roger stands in the boat like a statue. Suddenly he has forgotten the soldiers. He sees the halved coin, and only thinks of the large amounts of gold that must be hidden somewhere.
Roger: You really found it, ouh.
Will: Sure captain, here you go.
Roger: Man! Ha ha ha.
Popsy: Devil and gun barrel, shiny gold.
Roger: Look here Will, the two halves fit together. If only Broadside had known what he had in the dungeon all these years…
Popsy: Yes captain, mast and jailbreak.
Will: Are you able to recognize anything? Do you know where the treasure is?
Roger: Sure I do! That is a map of the island Sombrero, and the treasure is hidden close to the volcano. Ha ha ha, the treasure is mine!
Narrator: Willy rows to a nearby bay where the Dark Shark is anchored. Camilla climbs on boar on a rope ladder; Bosun Will follows her, and at last comes Roger.
Roger: Come on you two, or do you want to stay all night on the ladder? We have to set sails and disappear before… Wait? What’s up? Captain Foul!
Foul: Ha ha ha ha, welcome aboard captain Roger. I have heard that you wanted to go on a treasure hunt? Anything against if I come with you?
Roger: You fiend, what are you doing on-board my ship?
Foul: It was your ship, now it’s mine.
Roger: Where is the crew?
Foul: Tied up under deck. Culverin, your turn.
Culverin: Ay ay, captain.
Popsy: Thug! Always on the head.
Culverin: The parrot is flying away, captain Foul.
Foul: Let him fly Culverin, it’s enough that you have knocked out the captain.
Culverin: Ha ha ha, and now he is laying just as flat on the shipboards as Will. Ha ha ha ha, but what are we going to do with the young lady? Should I throw her overboard?
Foul: Nonsense, Culverin, we can get a pretty ransom for her. Let’s go people, hoist the sails!
Culverin: Pirates! Hoist the sails!
Narrator: The next morning the Dark Shark is sailing on the high sea. She is escorted by the Barracuda, the ship of the pirate captain Foul, and captain Roger and Bosun Will are now finally brought up on deck.
Foul: Spit it out, Roger, where have you hidden the coin?
Roger: What coin?
Foul: You know exactly what I’m talking about, the coin that leads to the treasure, where is it?
Roger: Give me back my crew and my ship, and I’ll think about sharing the treasure with you.
Foul: Thanks, but no thanks. Why should I be satisfied with a part, if I can have it all? Where is the coin? Say it, or you will both be thrown overboard.
Will: Not that, captain, it is swarming with sharks out there.
Foul: Listen Roger, I’ll give you a ship and supplies for a few days, and you give me the coin. Otherwise I’ll give you some swimming lessons.
Roger: No need to, I can swim.
Foul: Tie a rope around the boy, and lower him into the water.
Pirates: Ay Ay, captain.
Will: No! Don’t! You can’t do that!
Foul: Good, men, let him down.
Pirates: Let’s go. Ay Ay, captain.
Will: Please don’t! Don’t do it!
Pirates: Good. That’s too far. The sharks are coming already. Yes, yes, keep those legs up.
Roger: Calm down Will, don’t make a scene.
Foul: Cute little creatures, aren’t they? Look how the boy is thrashing. He can still keep his legs up so the sharks can’t reach him, but in a moment we will let him further down, and when his legs are dangling in the water…
Roger: All right, since my bosun is so sensitive, I’ll give you the coin.
Narrator: Captain foul is astounded. As bosun Will is in grave danger, captain Roger suddenly reaches for his peg leg, and opens it just above the knee, and would you believe it, in this spot there’s a secret compartment.
Roger: Here.
Foul: Oh, ha ha ha. You have a secret compartment in your peg leg, very interesting. That was where the coin was hidden, not bad, not bad at all.
Roger: Pull will up again.
Foul: Pull the kid up again!
Pirates: Ay Ay, captain. Pull him up. Pity, we were just having such a good time with him. The sharks almost got him. Let’s go.
Foul: Now for my part of the deal. Culverin, give Roger a suitable boat.
Culverin: Ay Ay, captain, Will be done.
Foul: And don’t forget the supplies, Culverin.
Culverin: Captain Roger, look this way. Ha ha ha, here is your ship.
Roger: A raft? A primitive raft? Foul, what is this supposed to mean?
Foul: You wanted a ship that suited you. Well, there you have it, let the raft into the water. Then down with captain Roger and his bosun, I don’t want to see them anymore.
Roger: You fiend! You crook! You, you sea robber! You will pay for this!
Narrator: Oh no, captain Roger had really not expected this. How are captain Roger and bosun Will supposed to survive on a raft like this? They seem to be lost.
Governor Broadside is once again attending his favourite pastime in Fort Rasselsword, he is eating a fried chicken. His sister Prudence and Lt. De Martinet are watching him. They have no appetite.
Broadside: Outrageous, how are those lousy pirates able to blow a hole in my prison? I’m losing my appetite by just thinking about it.
Prudence: That wouldn’t hurt you figure though.
De Martinet: Sir, the culprits have probably wrongfully acquired several tonnes of dynamite, and used it to free the prisoner.
Prudence: Rubbish, why have the guards not prevented this?
De Martinet: I gave 4 men the order to guard the prisoner bosun Will. Unfortunately they were overwhelmed.
Narrator: Lt. De Martinet is lying through his teeth. At the bottom of his heart he is a coward, but he is hoping soon to be promoted, and rise to the highest officer honours possible.
Broadside: Excuses, nothing but cheap excuses!
De Martinet: But governor?
Soldier: Excuse the interruption, but I have to loyally report that we have apprehended a suspect.
De Martinet: A suspect? Eh, excellent. Bring him here.
Popsy: Thunder and cannon blast.
Soldier: Here he is, sir.
De Martinet: A parrot? You have a parrot? Have you lost your mind?
Popsy: egg dispenser!
Soldier: Sir, eh, we believe that this bird is captain Roger’s parrot.
Popsy: Fat river beast.
Broadside: What on earth am I supposed to do with that parrot?
Popsy: Fatso! Idiot!
Broadside: That’s it! To the kitchen with that feathered beast. In at latest one hour I want it on my plate served with garlic sauce.
Prudence: But the parrot is only repeating what other people tell him.
Broadside: That’s even worse. No one has the right to call me that.
Popsy: Island Sombrero, volcano, treasure.
Broadside: Wait! Say that again.
Popsy: Fatso! Fat hippo!
Broadside: No, no, no, not that, the other thing.
Popsy: Island Sombrero! Treasure!
Broadside: The parrot can’t have made that up on its own. Lt. De Martinet?
De Martinet: Yes?
Broadside: Sound the alert. Make the flagship ready, we’re sailing to the Sombrero Island.
Narrator: Meanwhile captain Roger and bosun Will are drifting on the ocean. The sea is calm, and the sun is burning down from the sky. Sharks are circling the raft, their triangular back fins are cutting through the waves.
Roger: We’ll die of hunger and thirst, Will.
Will: Why? We have plenty of water and hardtack.
Roger: I’m talking about meat and rum, and we have none of that. There you can see what a fiend Foul is.
Will: Yes, indeed he is.
Roger: Imaging that we were sitting alongside good old Bessie in the Bottomless Barrel.
Will: I would rather not think about that, Captain, that just makes things worse. Captain, look out!
Roger: What?
Narrator: A shark attacks the raft. Will leans back in fear, but Roger is just laughing. He strikes lightning fast; he catches the fish with the iron hook on his left arm. With a powerful tug he pulls it up on the raft.
Roger: Now I have you.
Will: Great, that was masterfully done captain. Why didn’t you become a fisher? We could have fish with our hardtack every day.
Roger: Fish? Bah! I don’t like fish. I won’t touch that shark. Fish? So much bad luck in one day, this can’t be real.
Will: Captain?
Roger: What’s wrong, Will?
Will: Look at the clouds. I think a tornado is forming.
Roger: You’re right, and it’s a huge one. Shiver my timbers, now it’s getting serious.
Narrator: Captain Roger turns pale, he fears nothing more than the tropical storms, and worst of all storms are the tornados. He has no idea how they are supposed to survive that which is heading their way.
Will: What are we going to do?
Roger: Hold on tight and pray Will! Hopefully it won’t tear the raft apart.
Will: Ah! We’re turning around!
Roger: That’s just the start; it’ll spin us around a whole lot more. Damn it, if I survive this I’ll wring Foul’s neck.
Narrator: Enormous waves are building up. They are being tossed around on the foaming tips of the waves like a football. The tornado grabs them and slings them around again and again, so much that Will and captain Roger can barely hold onto the planks. They are drifting out of consciousness; their end seems to be close. Will is slowly waking up. It’s so quiet, where is he? In Heaven? Only there could it be so nice, the sun is burning on his back, and the birds’ singing is like music to his ears. He looks around and realizes to his surprise that he is on the beach of an island. He has survived the storm, but the peace will soon be over.
Roger: Hey Will! Do you want to sleep all day? Get up! We have a lot of work waiting on us.
Will: Captain Roger? You’re alive?
Roger: Of course, ha ha ha, such a little breeze can’t shake up a pirate captain like me.
Will: Where are we?
Roger: No idea, let’s look around a bit, that way we’ll probably find out. So, let’s go!
Will: I’m hungry, but most of all thirsty. Maybe there is water and eatable fruits somewhere?
Roger: What are you talking about? What we need is a good tavern, where they will serve us juicy stakes and rum. The problem is though, that we’re on an uninhabited island.
Will: You’re wrong captain; there are footprints in the sand.
Roger: What? You are right. Why are you still sitting down? Get on your feet, we are following the prints. But be quiet.
Will: Who could have made those prints?
Roger: A man made them, he was wearing shoes.
Will: There! I can hear voices.
Narrator: Captain roger and Will are looking through the leaves of a few bushes at a clearing. Captain Foul and his pirates have gathered there. Along with them are the crewmembers of the Dark Shark. They have found the treasure of the halved coin. Captain roger can smell the gold, his eye glows, and his blood pressure rises. There is no way back now.
Roger: Captain Foul and his men. Ha, that crook wants to steal my treasure, my treasure. Ouh! I can’t stand it.
Will: Our men are there too, but they aren’t putting up a fight.
Foul: Open the chest. I want to see the gold.
Will: Huh? Camilla, we have to free her.
Roger: First of all we have to get the gold. Let’s take on those two pirates and take their weapons, then we’ll get started. (It can be heard how they are fighting the men) I have the guy’s sabre.
Will: And I have a pistol in addition to that.
Roger: That’s enough, now for the rest of them. Go!
Camilla: Will!
Foul: Captain Roger, where did he come from?
Narrator: The limbs of the evil Foul go soft from fear. He definitely hadn’t expected captain Roger. On the other side the crew of the Dark Shark cheer as they recognize their captain.
Roger’s pirates: That’s Will and our captain!
Roger: At them people, fight! Rummy, show those sea robbers. Foul, now you’ll have to pay for your crimes!
Will: Come over here, Culverin, show me what you can. (A trumpet fanfare can be heard in the background.) Soldiers! Soldiers everywhere, they have surrounded us.
Narrator: The gold is so close that captain Roger could touch it, but Governor Broadside is approaching. He is confident, the money is of course for him, and him only.
Soldier: Governor Broadside!
Broadside: I hope I’m not interrupting anything, keep fighting, I’ll hang the victor.
Culverin: Where did he come from?
Foul: I didn’t invite the governor, Culverin, neither did I invite his soldiers.
Culverin: But captain Foul, what do we do now?
Fowl: Erhm eh, captain Roger, listen to me, each of us on their own do not stand a chance. My suggestion, we work together and split up the treasure later.
Roger: Not bad, Foul, how much for each?
Foul: How about a third for you?
Roger: A third? A tornado must have swept through your brain. Get over here you little measly sea robber!
Popsy: Sea robber! Fatso!
Will: What’s up with Popsy? The parrot is going nuts.
Roger: Calm down Will, he always does that before a volcanic eruption.
Will: A volcanic eruption?

Soldier: Volcanic eruption?
Pirate: Did you hear what captain Roger said?
Pirate: Can you hear how it is rumbling?
Pirate: There! The volcano, clouds are shooting out of it! Run! Run!
Narrator: Suddenly it’s clear to everyone that the volcano has been rumbling and stirring for a long time now. They look up to it and see that it is emitting dark smoke clouds. The ground beneath their feet shake, and everyone realises that it is going to blow. The gold is forgotten, everyone is just thinking of their own lives.
Broadside: Come Camilla, we have to get to the ship, hurry.
Camilla: But Willy?
Pirates: Run men! Yes, run.
Will: Captain Roger, leave the treasure, we have to get out of here.
Roger: Nonsense, I didn’t get here to bail out at the last moment.
Will: But that is insane, come, it’s only gold.
Roger: Only gold? Only? It is my gold! I’ll take it with me. Grab a hold, or do you want to start a mutiny?
Will: The volcano is erupting. Look, it is spitting out fire. Let’s get out of here! And additionally you should watch you head, the coconuts are falling of the trees.
Roger: Why should I care about the coconuts? You’ll grab a hold Will, or I’ll Orau!
Polly: Fool! Bulls eye!
Will: Rummy, help me! Captain Roger is unconscious. Hurry, we have to carry him on board.
Rummy: What happened, Will?
Will: A coconut fell on the fool’s head. Let’s go, hurry!
Rummy: Yes, will do. You take the legs, I the arms. And now hurry!
Will: I hope governor Broadside won’t open fire on us while we get on board.
Rummy: No worry, he just wants to save his own skin. Into the boat, and then let’s go.
Will: Yes, the others are far ahead of us already.
Narrator: Bosun Will and helmsman Rummy put the unconscious captain into a rowboat and him and themselves to safety. The volcano is spewing out more and more fire and ash, but captain Roger’s Dark Shark, captain Foul’s Barracuda and governor Broadsides Cannonball manages to bring themselves to safety on the high sea.
One day after the great volcanic eruption on Sombrero Island captain Roger and Bosun Will sit and a table in front of the tavern The Bottomless Barrel and are looking out to the sea. Depressed captain Roger is hanging his head, he hasn’t even touched his food.
Roger: Oh, oh.
Will: Calm down captain. It is of no use to get angry over spilled milk.
Roger: Milk? Will, that was my treasure. The beautiful gold, it has been lost forever, buried under the lava from the volcano.
Will: Cheer up, captain, there are many other treasure out there.
Roger: Ach, I’ll go inside, I’ll drink some rum. Do you want any?
Will: Ha ha, no thanks, you know that I don’t drink rum.
Roger: Ach, how will you ever become a proper pirate?
Seller: Bosun!
Will: What do you want?
Seller: It is very, very important. (Choughs) I have to talk to captain Roger. I, I have a real map, of captain Garcia’s famous treasure.
Will: Oh really?
Seller: Yes! The gold is hidden on a volcanic island, that’s why I’m afraid to go there.
Will: You’re afraid of the volcano, or what? I can understand that.
Seller: A, oh yes, ha ha, I’m afraid. But captain Roger and you are a couple of brave guys. I’ll sell the map to you for 300 Ducats. Nah?
Will: Hey, look over to our ship.
Seller: Why that? What’s up with it?
Will: You’ll notice in a moment. Just look, and go a little closer to the harbour wall. Just so, that’s good.
Seller: Hmm…I can’t see anything.
Will: Now it comes. (Will kicks the map seller into the water.)
Seller: Argh!
Roger: Hey Will, what is going on? Did someone fall into the water?
Will: Yes yes, some vagabond. I think he stumbled.
Roger: Was there something special?
Will: No, no, absolutely nothing. Just go back inside and enjoy your rum. You have earned it.
Roger: Exactly, I’ll do that. I’ll drink rum because there is no gold to be seen here far and wide,
Will: Yes, not even a treasure map. Enjoy it, captain.
 The end!

Pirates (1) The Golden Medallion

Capt'n Roger - Wolfgan Völz 

Bosun Willy - Sascha Draeger 

Helmsman Rumpott - Harald Eggers 

Bessie - Renate Pichler 

Governor Broadside - Rudolf Weber-Lange 

Lieutenant de Martinez - Michael Harck 

Camilla - Kerstin Draeger 

Auntie Rebecca - Marianne Kehlau 

Capt'n Baddog - Jürgen Thormann 

Polly the Parrot - Beate Hasenau 

1st Mate Dumbo and Speedy, the monkey - Manfred Erler 

Narrator - Rainer Schmitt 

Author: H. G. Francis 

Director: Heikedine Körting 

Music: EUROPA Recording Studio 

Editing: Hedda Kehrhahn 

Sound: Roland Michel 

A EUROPA Recording Studio production 

Case Art: Dr. Beurmann